


If I'm So Wrong, How Can You Listen All Night Long [Frerard]

by shrrlocked



Category: Frank Iero - Fandom, Gerard Way - Fandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Frankie - Freeform, Frerard, Frerard Au, M/M, Teen!Frank, Teen!Gerard, frnk, frnk/gee, gee
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-07-29
Packaged: 2018-04-07 16:47:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4270626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrrlocked/pseuds/shrrlocked
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Online role-playing games are Gerard's only way of having any sort of fun at home. And the good thing about it? He doesn't have to get to know anyone; it's all completely anonymous. You are your character. But then a player sends him a private message by mistake, and he can't stop talking to - or about - this mysterious stranger. Can he ever get the courage to ask his name? Or will his personality leave him stranded on an island of abandoned hope?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so you guys might recognise this, I decided to make the two chapters I originally have up into one chapter, but whilst doing so I deleted the original version.
> 
> I don't know how this is going to go, but I'm looking forward to writing more of it.
> 
> I am really bad at updating so be prepared for long waits in between updates, also I get writer's block often, because I can't word anything properly xD
> 
> Please leave Kudos or comment your thoughts on this story or my writing in general (e.g. the pace, the balance between dialogue and narrative, the length of chapters/paragraphs); I really want to improve so please criticise!
> 
> Thanks guys!
> 
> \- shrrlocked xx

"I'm sorry, am I interrupting your day Mr Way?"

The ghastly voice of my English teacher is not one you can ignore easily, especially when he's shouting at you in a silent classroom.

"Yes actually," I reply, staring up at his frankly ugly face. My day's been shit enough, I really can't be bothered to try and be polite. Not this time. "Has the bell gone yet?"

If it is at all possible, Mr Green's face turns a darker shade of red, and I wouldn't be surprised if he'd burst a vein. "My office. Now! And give me your phone!"

Dammit, I thought I'd gotten away with it. I do as I am told for once, and place my phone in his outstretched hand, flipping him off once his back was turned.

Half an hour and several threats of isolation later, I have my phone back and am heading home from this hell-hole they call school. There's literally nothing good about it. The only person I get on with is this kid called Ray Toro (at least I think that's his name), but he's a bit... well... weird. Not that I am normal. Far from it. But Ray? Don't even go there.

When I finally get home, I see that Mom has already picked Mikey up from his school... the little prick. He's alright really, but he just REALLY gets on my fucking nerves most of the time. 

Heading straight for my room, I grab a coffee off the counter (Mum always has one ready for me). 

For three hours I am sat in my room playing Dungeons and Dragons with a bunch of strangers. Not literally of course, it's a website I found. Basically you just choose your character and from then on you are anonymous. No-one knows who you are and you don't know who anyone is. No hate that way. Of course, you can send private messages to people if you know their username, but personally I think that defeats the object.

Did I mention I am on my fourth coffee?

To me, and, I'm guessing, many of the other losers (me included) on this site, this is an escape from the real world. Where teacher's and school and fucking homework mean nothing. Where the only fights you get into are evenly matched and are against people who don't know your weaknesses. Where it doesn't matter if you mess up, because it isn't real. 

That's something not even music can do for me. 

I quickly glance over to my guitar hung up on my wall, making a mental note to buy new strings for it. 

I lied slightly when I said I didn't enjoy school at all. Music is an alright lesson, the teacher's nice and all, but I never have anyone to work with. Well Ray, but... you know... 

There's also Art. My favourite subject by far; everyone leaves me alone and I just do what I like. Miss Edwards doesn't mind because apparently I have a talent and can nurture it however I freaking want. Yay for me. 

There's a knock at my door and in pops a small head, with the lovable air that fools everyone now, but will be everyone's downfall later in life.

"Gee, Mom said you have to come down for dinner."

I sigh, making a big show out of pausing the game and taking off my headphones. "No, tell her I'm not hungry, Mikey." 

A lie. I'm extremely hungry, but I can't risk being with my parent's in case the school's rang about earlier.

What if they've already rang.

Stay calm.

Don't hyperventilate.

My hands go straight to my head and I can hear my heart pounding. Fast. Too fast. 

CALM. DOWN.

SHIT

NO

HELP

FUCK

"Gee?" I feel, however lightly, my little brother's hand land on the small of my back, and I hate to admit it, but it really helps.

My breathing slows and eventually returns to normal, as does my heart rate.

Mikey's still looking at me with concern. I am just glad he didn't panic and call for Mom.

"I'm fine Mikey," I say, pulling away from his touch. "Now go downstairs. And do not tell Mom, okay?"

He nods, backing out of my room. I almost feel bad for scaring him. 

*****

"Gerard! Hey Gerard!" 

I look up to see Ray running over towards me, his afro bobbing up and down everytime he put one foot in front of the other. I rub my forehead before putting my books back in my locker. 

Great. Now everyone's looking at me.  _Don't look at me. Don't look at me._ I can cope with all the people at school, provided no-one looks at me. Because you know what happens when they look at me? 

They judge me.

Everything I do.

Everything I say.

The way I look.

And sometimes I just can't take it, it's too much pressure.

Thankfully it doesn't happen that often, but with Ray running towards me, shouting my name so loud I'm pretty sure the whole town can hear, I expect nothing less.

All I can do is thank God, or whoever is looking down on me, that I had the good sense to not put too much eyeliner on this morning. The last thing I want to happen is people to say I'm gay. I don't want any of them to know anything about me. Once one person knows, the whole school knows.

When Ray reaches me, he takes a minute to regain his breath, and in that minute everyone seems to lose interest in me. I breath out a sigh of relief.

"You here for a reason? Or just here to get on my nerves and make everyone look at me?" I almost spit at Ray. Boy is he not in my good books right now.

He looks slightly taken aback. "Um... I was just wondering if you wanted to come to a party that my friend Bob's having. He told me to invite people and you're the only one I could think of."

It takes me a minute to process what he just said. I mean, he'd always been the only person close to a friend at this horrid place, but I'd never thought he might consider me his closest friend. Fuck that's weird.

But however touched (and slightly freaked out) I am feeling, nothing gets past my whole 'I don't give a shit' guise.

"You think I want to go to a lame ass party?" I say, turning back to retrieve my forgotten books from my locker.

"It-it won't be lame..." Ray counters. I feel kinda bad, but me? At a party? Nu-uh. No way. 

I shake my head. "Sorry dude, but I don't do parties." Or socialising of any kind.

"Oh come on, Bob's pretty cool. But if you don't wanna go, then I guess I can't force you. Enjoy the rest of your day." Ray's face as he walks off tugs at whatever kind of a heart I have in there. He obviously thought I was going to agree to come. Oh well... It just means I can play more D and D. I feel the smallest smile appear on my face. 

*****

That conversations plays on my mind for the rest of the day, all the way through whatever crap I was meant to be learning, even through Art and Music. Despite not wanting to go, I feel really guilty. I mean, I probably just ruined that kid's day. 

As I round the corner onto my street, I notice Ray walking slightly ahead. Huh. I guess he must live nearer to me then I thought.

After a couple seconds of assessing my situation, I make up my mind.

Quickening my pace, I shout ahead. 

"Hey, Ray!" 

He turns, and he looks utterly dejected. Seeing it's me, his expression turns a little sour.

"Oh... Hey..." 

I've caught up with him now.

"I'll come."

"What?"

"I'll come to this party. Sorry, I was in a really bad mood earlier." Because you'd drawn everyone's attention to me you little prick.

His face lights up with delight, and a little part of me wants to hug him, but I refrain from doing so. You know, because I don't give a shit what people think.

He tells me it's this Friday at 8, and lets me have a slip of paper with the address on.

When I eventually get inside, it's quarter of an hour later than usual, and Mum's already gone out to work. Mikey's at a friend's so I have the house to myself. This is a rare luxury, as it means I can play my music out loud.

And within fifteen minutes, I've forgotten anything out-of-the-ordinary happened today.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long...
> 
> Please let me know what you think!
> 
> \- shrrlocked xx

"Bob, this is my friend Gerard."

I glare at Ray for introducing me as his friend. We may be closer to each other than anyone else... but we are most definitely NOT friends.

Ray's friend, and our host for this evening – God that sounds posh - is actually less lame then I had imagined him. He has long(ish) blonde hair, and a fringe that hangs down over his eyes. His face is friendly enough now, a big grin spread over it at the sight of Ray.

But most importantly, he's wearing a Misfits t-shirt, much similar to the one I have at home.

The party is not in a field, as I thought it would be, but in Bob's rather big house. Ray told me on the way here (he insisted on picking me up, for God's sake Ray I'm not three) that Bob's parents are on holiday and don't care what he does whilst they're away, as long as everything is normal when they get back.

"I think everyone's here now so I'll walk in with you guys," Bob turns to me and smiles. "No adult behaviour okay Gerard?"

I laugh. "Who would wanna do anything with me?" Besides my hand.

"You kidding? You're hot – not that I'm gay, but as friend to friend-"

"We're not friend's," I mutter, but he continues.

"-you're really attractive." He winks at me.

"Stop it."

"I'm sorry?"

"Stop lying to me..."

We've all stopped walking now. I'm glaring at Bob, who's just looking really confused and hurt; serves him right, the fucking idiot. And Ray's just standing to the side, looking down at his feet, probably wishing he'd never invited me to this stupid place. Me too Ray, me too.

"Why would I-"

"YOU ARE LYING," I scream at him, causing others to glance up in our direction. "NOTHING ABOUT ME IS ANY GOOD. NOTHING. JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME SO WHY ARE YOU EVEN TALKING TO ME. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I'M AT THIS STUPID PARTY. I ONLY CAME BECAUSE I FELT A TINY BIT SORRY FOR SOME KID IN MY CLASS." I gesture to Ray who's starting to back away and looks like he's about to burst into tears. I lower my voice a little. "Right now I could be doing something useful with my time, but no, I can either stay here or walk for three hours til I get home."

I'm now slightly out of breath, everything else has gone silent. I subconsciously run my fingers over the underside of my wrist, before clenching both hands into fists and walking away.

I manage to make it outside the house without anyone following me. Or so I think.

I stride past row after row of decent sized houses with neat lawns and expensive cars before finding a solitary bench in a small park.

I drop onto it. I want to cry, but nothing happens. Why did I have to accept Ray's fucking stupid offer. What the fuck was I thinking? I barely lasted five minutes in there. Didn't even have time to grab a drink.

All of a sudden I realise there's someone stood in front of me. A hooded figure. Like in the movies. God I hope I don't get killed... or would it really be a bad thing?

"The fuck do you want?" I ask the stranger, hoping to God he didn't see me trying to cry and that I come across much, much tougher than I am.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay? You were a bit... upset... back at Barry... Bart? Ben...?"

"Bob?"

"Yeah... Bob's house."

"Huh, upset's one word for it." I sigh, moving over so he can sit beside me. "I just freaked out you know. So many people I don't know. And then Bob goes and speaks to me as if we're friends, and starts lying to me and... ugh... I don't even know why I thought going would be a good idea."

The stranger holds out his hand. "I'm Bert."

I take his hand and shake it. "Gerard."

"Well Gerard, I've got something that might make you feel better."

He reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a glass bottle of clear liquid: Vodka. He hands it to me, but I shake my head, leaning away from it as if it is poisonous.

He holds it in front of my face and shakes it a bit. "Come on," he whines. "It'll be fun!"

Unscrewing the cap of the bottle, Bert takes a huge swig. A grin appears on his face and he looks happier than he did a minute ago. _Maybe it won't be so bad._

"Fine," I say, reaching out for the drink and following Bert's lead. The drink is cold and I shiver a bit at the unfamiliar taste. I don't notice any difference, so I drink some more.

And more.

And more.

Eventually, I've drunk so much that my words are slurring and I don't really know what I'm doing. All I know is that this stuff is good. And that I don't care about anything or anyone else anymore.

A lot of time passes with me and Bert just sat on the bench, drinking and talking, but mostly drinking.

After a while, Bert says to me (in between hiccups): "I have something else for you to try."

He grins pulling out a bag of red pills from the inside of his coat. "These - these are - fantastic." Hiccup. "You won't remember a thing."

 _What's the worst that can happen?_ I think, popping two into my mouth.

And that's the last thing I remember from that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry... xD
> 
> Please leave kudos/comment
> 
> \- shrrlocked


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